Well, that was unexpected.

I hadn’t gotten ’round to writing about Date #1 with F. (which involved greasy, yummy, New York-style pizza followed by karaoke). I hadn’t had a chance to mention that he called the next day, and I invited him to Shabbat dinner here, which was hosted (i.e., fully cooked and prepared) by a friend of mine, and how he stayed after everyone else did to help clean up, then just stayed around to enjoy my company for quite a while longer.

But it seems none of that’s terribly relevant now. Last night he called while I was at services (Tisha B’Av began last night and continued until an hour past sundown today — a fast day on which we mourn the destruction of the Temples and the loss of Jerusalem), and left a voicemail asking me to give him a call. I didn’t notice the message until this morning, so I e-mailed him from work but didn’t hear back. I called him tonight, and he said, “I’m just really not feeling right about us.” For the first time in his life, it seems, he’s not in “relationship mode.” He thinks I’m a terrific woman — oh, don’t they all, except my ex, when they’re tossing me aside? — but he’s just not in the right place right now. And apparently, the reason it took him so long to call me back after I first asked him out was that he was debating whether or not to tell me that he wasn’t in “relationship mode.” His friends said, “Nah, just give it a shot and see how it goes.” So he did, and apparently it didn’t go well enough to get him into relationship mode, hence the phone call. Seven months ago, I wasn’t ready, but he was; now I am, and he isn’t. Karma, perhaps, or poetic justice.

Tomorrow I have a not-quite-a-date. I’m having lunch with a gent who’s on the Board with me at shul, and an eligible bachelor who works at his law firm. So it’s a set-up with a chaperone.

And in related news, I just dropped another $100 for a 3-month JDate subscription. Lucky me.


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